Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
