Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
