Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
