The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
