brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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