Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
