Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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