He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
