did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize