So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
