adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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