i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
