you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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