where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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