The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
