New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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