Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
