Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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