My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
