Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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