Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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