We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
they're like a gay fantastic four
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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