But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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