k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize