She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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