Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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