Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
