idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
