sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize