i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize
