you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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