On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
