How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
