i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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