Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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