I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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