so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
