East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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