hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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