Already got asked if we're dating
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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