would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize