i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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