Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
