you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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