I love black thongs
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
he thought i was a dude.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize