Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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