Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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