Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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