You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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