Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
