you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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