You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I hate all girls vehemently.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
