He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
