me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
