Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
