Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Are my feet made of real feet?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
